Monday, September 24, 2012

It's all Insanity..

Hello blogger world! It's been... hmmm... almost 6 months since I last blogged (the night before Ezze was born). Doesn't seem like that long! As I'm sitting here my little almost-6-month old is SITTING next to me playing with her squishy block. She's adorable. :) But that's not entirely why I'm here. I'm starting a new journey with my hubby (actually 2, but that story to come later.:) :) ). Today is our first day of INSANITY! We are doing it together, as well as planning every one of our 5 meals a day together, and he will be very good at keeping me on track. I will try and blog very often about this new adventure in our lives. I'm very excited!!! So here we go...

DAY 1.

I feel like death. Don't get me wrong, the workout I LOVED (Thanks AMANDA NASH who told me I would!).. This is also my first day WITHOUT CAFFEINE. That means NO coffee. My head is pounding as we speak. It will take me about 3 days to feel "normal" again. This is a price I'm willing to pay for a healthier me, even though coffee isn't really bad for you. It's the addiction I didn't want. Today I ate FABULOUSLY (Special thanks to my hubby)!! Breakfast was Kashi GO LEAN CRUNCH cereal with my delicious Almost milk. Snack was a packet of yummy nuts and a string cheese, lunch was SHAKEOLOGY (if you've never heard of this, YOU TUBE IT!!), snack was 2 string cheese and 13 turkey pepperoni's and then supper ... I'm not sure yet. Protein, veggies, fruit and thats probably about it.

This is just the beginning.. and I have to keep telling myself that! I'm so excited for the next 60 days!! YAY!!!

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Tomorrow..

This is my last day being pregnant with Ezmae. I'm gonna be real, I'm kind of relieved. I've been pretty uncomfortable these past few weeks, it will be nice to have little things back. Like a normal sized bladder, non-swollen feet, this annoying stretching pain in my upper abdomen whenever I lay down will be gone, and really to just NOT be achy. Now that I'm done complaining, let me share how I'm feeling right now.

My first feeling is uncertainty. I'm not extremely worried, or feeling sick with anxiety, I'm just unsure how it will all go. How I will feel when we actually go into the OR and start the whole thing. Unsure how Eliza will feel when we come home, and so much of my time is "demanded" by baby. Unsure how my feelings of Post-Partum "depression" will be this time. I'm praying for lots of SUNSHINE and nice weather so I can have my windows open, b/c that always makes me feel good. I'm praying recovery goes well. Really, with Eliza, my recovery took quite a while. My tailbone was bruised so badly, among other things, I couldn't sit comfortably for about 2 weeks. It was not fun. My DR told me after 2 weeks I should be feeling much better, so I'm anxious to compare the 2 recoveries. Just for my own personal knowledge. Not so I can tell people this and that.

I'm sure all these feelings are perfectly normal for your second baby. After all, I've done it all before, so I kind of know how I will be feeling. Just praying its going to be a lot better then I expect. I do have Eliza to bring me Joy and of course, a new baby girl. Hubby will be home for 2 1/2 weeks, and I'm sure I will have lots of texts from friends and visitors. I know I will not be alone, especially in my God. He will never forsake me or let me feel alone. I'm sure my days will be filled with lots of Dora and Diego. Hopefully I can get Eliza to venture into some new shows and movies.

Now that I've rambled for a while, that's basically it. I can't believe it's tomorrow. 18 hours from now. Wow. Maybe reality will set in tomorrow morning when I have to get up at 4-4:15. Pray for me!!! And for our family. Tomorrow begins a new chapter in our lives. I can't wait to see what it holds!! :)


Saturday, March 31, 2012

And so begins the countdown..

3.5 days. That's it... I cannot believe it. This pregnancy has gone by SO FAST. Like triple the speed of my first. I'm sort of hoping this isn't a glimpse into how fast life will go by with 2 babies. BUT I will embrace every moment.

Tonight hubby and I are having 1 last DATE NIGHT before baby is born. I'm so excited! We are going out to eat at Red Lobster (which is very special to me b/c hubby hates seafood) and then going to see The Lorax in 3-D. :) Yes, we are that awesome. We will be out LATE for us, so I'm fully expecting to take a nap tomorrow afternoon, if Liza doesn't fall asleep during church, that is. I've decided to embrace these last few days with my "Family of 3" with Love and JOY! I already have butterflies in my tummy, thinking about Wednesday, but I have 3 full days with Eliza. I will take full advantage of that. Her world is about to be rocked... SO we will have lots of MOMMY and LIZA time. Now that I think of it.. I hope that doesn't make it worse.... :/

So Eliza will be staying with Grandma tonight and I will pick her up tomorrow morning for church, where all the cute toddlers and babies get to carry palm branches down the aisle in honor of Palm Sunday. :) She will be adorable, as usual.

On another note, her birthday party was last Sunday, even though her actual birthday isn't for a few more weeks. We wanted to celebrate before the new baby came and it could be all about Eliza. SO, my next post will include a lot of info about NEW BABY and the c-section. Stay tuned!!! :) I'm so excited!!!!!!!!


Seeing her cake for the first time. Dora!!


I love this. She got all bashful when everyone started
singing.



She loved the pinata! 


And bubbles. We had to have bubbles!! :) 



Happy Saturday! 

Friday, March 16, 2012

Spring!

I cannot get over this weather. My windows are open and the breeze is floating through my house like it's July! When I look outside, it seems very strange that there are NO LEAVES on the trees and our lawn is still brown. This is so amazing! I think God was really giving me a break this winter because He knows how much I hate the cold. :)

When I gave birth to Eliza, ON her birthday it was one of the nicest days that spring. I think it was about 71, and when we left it was only in the 60's. I struggled (just like any new mom) getting a new routine together and also with post-partum "depression". I felt like I was in a cave, adjusting to this new mommy thing, and I missed ALL of spring! By the time I was venturing out with my new little bundle, summer was in full swing! THIS TIME, I feel like God is giving me a little blessing! I really pray that my post-partum is a lot shorter this time, and I think I will adjust quicker. But I love this weather!!!! Summer makes me so happy. I LOVE the hot. I love the sun. And I feel like SPRING is already here, and who knows... by April 4th we may be into SUMMER!!!! (wishful thinking).

So go enjoy this beautiful "Summer" day! We are grilling out tonight! What are you plans for the weekend?! Can you believe it's only March 16th?!?!?!?!!?!?!?


LALALA it makes me want to sing!!!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

I have a reason to worship!

Today is March 7th. Exactly 4 weeks until we meet Baby E! Since my last post, I have had endless encouragement from friends and loved ones and even a few people I don't really even know! In a way, I was afraid the world WOULD judge me for my decision, but then again, who am I to the world?! And really in the end, what does it matter?

There is a song that has ministered to me so much over these past few years, and so much even now. About 3 years ago, my hubby and I were going through a real trial. We could. not. get. pregnant. We even went to the Dr. to make sure everything was fine, and it was. So why wasn't it happening?? I know people have suffered with this much longer than we had to, but 10 months was a long time for us, to be constantly trying. It was very testing for me. I think Casey always knew it would happen sooner or later, so he didn't fret with it as much as I did. But, wow. God put me through the Fire. I remember one certain point when Casey and I went with our youth group to a youth conference in Kansas City. It was so refreshing! One of my dear friends Libby and her hubby prayed with Casey and I, really giving hope and encouragement that this WOULD come! And even that Sunday after, at our home church, she once again prayed with me and talked with me after saying how she really felt God would bring this to pass SOON! And wouldn't you know... I was ALREADY PREGNANT at that time!!!! I found out the next weekend! OH HOW GOD IS FAITHFUL!!! And what would my life be like if I DIDN'T have Eliza?! It hurts to even think about that!!!!

So even now, through this small trial, God WILL remain faithful to me, as He ALWAYS has in the past!! Have you read my love story?? Check it out. Always, always, always faithful.

My song. "This is my prayer in the Fire, in weakness with trial or pain. There is a Faith proved in more worth than gold, so REFINE me Lord THROUGH the flame! I will bring praise, I will bring praise, no weapon formed against me shall remain. I will rejoice! I will declare, God is my VICTORY and He is here!..... I am a conquerer and co-heir with Christ!!! All of my life, in every season, You are STILL GOD! I have a reason to SING! I have a reason to WORSHIP!!!"

Oh my goodness, What a blessing it has been to me!! Constantly on REPEAT in my home!!! God is faithful! GOD is STILL GOD!!!!!!!!

Amen.

Thank you for praying for me, friends! 4 more weeks!!! 4 more weeks!!! I can't wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God has given me JOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Not so perfect.

Well here I go.

I had a normal prenatal appointment on Thursday. Baby's heart rate was great.. I'm measuring great.. Blood pressure was great.. urine sample was great.. weight gain is fine. Basically everything is great! We also had a ultrasound on Wednesday to follow up on a kidney issue from earlier in my pregnancy, and baby is great! Everything is perfect. Perfect...... Is it really?

So as some of you know, Eliza was born in spite of Shoulder Dystocia. We've learned since then, that the word "dystocia" simply means "obstruction". What 1 doctor may consider dystocia, another may not. Everyone has their own "moment" as when to call it "dystocia". SO, there is nothing you can do to prevent it and since it has happened once, its is way more likely that it will happen again. Baby can be born with total paralysis on one side of the body that will NEVER heal, Nerve damage, and of course baby can die if you can't get the shoulders out. It will suffocate. Broken collar bone.... yea.

I was seeing the Midwives at our hospital and they wanted me to see the OB that also works with them, b/c they aren't comfortable delivering baby #2 due to my history. (Blow #1). So we meet him, and he's very nice and very informative about the dystocia and NOW all my risks that I have. He never pushed me into birthing one way or another. So now I'm thinking, "OK.. so I know I'm high risk, but just b/c it happened once doesn't mean it will happen again, and GOD IS IN CONTROL!" Then I go on with my life for a few more weeks.

Thursday was my breaking point. I asked if he would induce me due to the whole thing, and he said no (which I was relieved at this point... for only a second). Then he asked me if I had an epidural with Eliza. NO! I did not. Then he asked me if I was going to have one with this baby and again I said no. He then when into this whole thing about how he HIGHLY HIGHLY STRONGLY recommends it.. b/c of things that could go wrong due to the dystocia and things they may have to do last second to "get the baby out". ... I about puked all over the floor. I'm sure all the blood had drained from my face and I looked like I was going to pass out. Now keep in mind, I KNOW I have the right to refuse an epidural, b/c it IS my body, but he can also say that we will need to find someone else to deliver this baby too.

SO in my mind I start going over everything I know about an epidural. Slowing labor.. stopping contractions.. failure to progress... SOOOOO Oh no! We need to give you pitocin to SPEED IT UP since the epidural stopped it!!! And then, BOOM! "EMERGENCY C-SECTION"!!!!!!!!! and it's all due to "failure to progress" which is b/c OF ALL THE DRUGS THEY GAVE YOU!

I am an all natural momma. I have judged people I don't even know who have had c-sections.. saying they weren't well educated. I have done this.

SO Casey then asks the DR what a c-section would be like, b/c in his mind, its all CRAZY and people are all running around.. and all that. So our Dr then tells us you just come in the morning, you get an IV started, bla bla bla and it takes about 30-45 minutes and then you will be up walking that evening.

Ok, so we leave the office, and Casey says to me, You need to talk to me. And I say.. I know.. I just think I'm gonna puke. We make it a few blocks before I. Break. Down. Very few times have I felt this gut wrenching pain within me, knowing there is nothing I really can do. I sobbed. And sobbed. And sobbed. I tweeted to my dear friends who would pray for me in that moment. My husband is a rock. He is sturdy. Unmoveable. He says to me, "Meghan, do you want to know what I think? You're not gonna like it." I say. NO. Already knowing exactly what my practical husband is going to say. He says to me, "I think we need to have a c-section." At this moment I feel like I'm falling so fast into a huge hole and there is nothing to cling to. Everything I have learned about natural child birth. Everything I have stood for. Gone. That's it. I really had 1 chance to experience it all, and now it's done. What was it for?

Yes, I knew he was right. This is the most logical and SAFEST option for our baby girl. I just could not wrap my mind around it. NEVER in my life did I EVER think this would happen to me. A scheduled c-section?! NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But God has a way of humbling us. Casey took me to Cold Stone, which as you can imagine, I didn't go in. Then we went to Target. My favorite store. By this time he had me laughing in between sobs, and made me go in. I wasn't in the mood to shop for cute hospital clothes, so we bought candy and a new outfit for our new baby girl to come home in. (I'll post pics later on.) When we left I WAS feeling a lot better. (Thanks to all you who were praying for me, even though you didn't know what was going on.) On our way home I said.. I always know when something happens that God has a reason, or a lesson. I wonder what this is. So my smart hubby says something along these lines, but not this exactly.. "To humble you." He knows I have issues with my pride. He is so honest with me. And at that moment, I knew he was right. Maybe that's not the whole reason, but it is definitely part of it.

So now, we've totally decided that a scheduled c-section is what we will do, and will probably have to do with the rest of our babies. My issues now are  not thinking about the actual c-section itself, b/c I'm still freaking out about that. But that's only a very short amount of time, and then I'll get my baby girl! Lots of thoughts have gone through my mind. "People will think less of me. People will judge me. I will be less of a mother if I do it this way. I'm cheating. This isn't how child birth is supposed to be. I could probably still do it natural (and risk baby's life.. yes I know), and so on and on." So Casey tells me I worry way to much about what other people think, first of all, and second, it's not like I WAS just scheduling it just to do it. I've already birthed one baby naturally (and believe me, it wasn't easy).. so what do I have to prove? My friend RUTHANN told me about a book thats like.. Women's brains are like spaghetti and men's are like waffles... Well, Casey has totally moved on. This is our decision, and now on to the next thing (which is a battery opperated skate board by the way.. lol), and ME... I'm still going over it. Just today, he said.. "Meghan, you need to move on." Yes I was slightly offended, but proves my point how men are different.

Anyway, now I'm asking for all your prayers. I know God is STILL IN CONTROL, even when it feels like everything is out of control. Well,, out of MY control. Lol. Funny how that works. God still has a plan. And this was probably it all along.. but we'll see. It's getting easier to accept every day. Even if it is just a tiny bit.


So here's to less than 6 weeks to go!!! Then we'll get to meet baby E. :) (Yes, we have a name!)


             
                                                  34 weeks!!! Yay!!!!!










Friday, February 17, 2012

The "I" Word

Some things we can't control. Things like.... childbirth. I guess there are certain things we can be in charge of, but when it comes down to it.. sometimes baby gets stuck. Yes. This happened to me.

My #1 baby girl had issues "coming out" (mind you, I STILL did it au'natural!!!!! ) and there is nothing you can do. So what happens when you're preggo with baby girl #2?? You are higher risk.

I've been aware of this ever since I birthed #1 but the closer it gets, the more it is becoming real. At my 32 week appointment yesterday, we briefly talked induction. I was with one of the midwives, with whom I will NOT birth :(. SO, at my next appointment with our OB we will talk more in depth about it.

Its crazy to think of this "I" word. I never thought it would "happen to me". Ya know? I took the classes. I've researched. I WILL do it natural.. I didn't really think that it would come to that. AND it may NOT! But, I'm accepting it. There are things we will start a little earlier than last time.. Primrose oil, raspberry leaf tea, walking.. and so on.

So, I'm here to say, that I know God is in control and the birth will be perfect. No matter what happens. After all, it's ONLY a 25% chance that it will happen again. :)

Prayers welcome!!!!

Friday, February 10, 2012

My hubby.

Today is my hubby's birthday. He is amazing. Did you know this? He really is. Have you ever heard our love story?? Well.... here it is!!

It was my senior year.. 2003-2004. I was still "sort of seeing" this other guy, (lets leave it there).. and I started working a lot of shifts at Hy-Vee with my now-hubby. 2 of my best friends, Hubby's brother, hubby and I spent a lot of time together. Well... hubby started "liking" one of my best friends. :) SOO he would talk with me about her, asking me if she would ever go out with him.. which I said "probably not" b/c I knew that he wasn't her type. Well, turns out he stopped liking her shortly after but continued to talk with me like he DID, just so I would talk to him. HE knew that if I KNEW he liked ME, I would back off.

SOOO he started coming around. A lot. :) I sort of "hit rock bottom" with a break-up of this other guy in January, 2004.. and Casey was there. He was just there. Spring came, and with that came track season. He came to almost EVERY SINGLE ONE of my track meets. Even traveling with MY MOM to the away ones. Casey is a people person. He gets along with almost everyone. If that was me, I probably wouldn't be traveling with his mom.. when I barely knew her. We spent LOTS of nights going on walks and getting to know each other. This was different for me b/c he was a "public school boy". I graduated from a private Christian school, and firmly believe in "Thou shalt not be unequally yolked together with unbelievers." So I prayed and prayed for his salvation. The week after Easter, he gave his heart to the Lord. My dad always called him "New Boy". He fit RIGHT in to my life. In with my people. In to my world. He was it. Who I had been waiting for my whole life, and been praying for since I was about 12 years old.

He let me heal. After a few months, (yes, only a few months) I could start to see this becoming a real relationship. You see, at first, I said I could NEVER see myself with him. I remember exactly where I was in my mom's kitchen saying that. BUT he started to grow on me. :) He was very aware of my past, b/c I made sure he knew exactly where I was coming from before we even started dating. He knew all of my feelings at the time, and again, just let me heal. HE was there. He was my rock.

 We started dating the day before my birthday in late May.. and 1 1/2 years later, we were engaged! It seems like just yesterday, and we've been married now for 5 1/2 years. He is amazing. He is patient. He is faithful. He is loving. He is funny. He is confident. He completes me. He tells me when I'm being ridiculous (which is a lot. I'm a drama queen.). He isn't afraid to tell me what he thinks. He is, in every single way, my other half. God had a definite plan for us. I'm so glad that I finally let GOD write my love story, instead of trying to write it myself. Amen. AND... he is an AMAZING father. He runs and laughs and plays and acts silly SO much more than I do with our daughter. He is loving to her. He kisses and hugs and holds her so gently. He is a pushover. :) We are expecting our 2nd baby GIRL in April, and then he will definitely be out numbered. His babies are his weakness.

SO anyway, that's it. My hubby is amazing. I don't know where I would be without him. The end.





Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Comparison- 31 week belly shot

Ok, so, for those of you that randomly stumble upon my blog, and don't know much about me, let me recap. :) I am pregnant with our second baby girl, EXACTLY 2 years after our first one. Yes. Exactly. I bet you I got pregnant just DAYS from when I got pregnant with Eliza. I am due 6 DAYS before her birthday.. and honestly.. they have moved it up a couple days based on the ultrasound. My original due date was 3 days before her birthday.

Anyway, I'm a very organized, detailed and precise person. For a long time everything about myself seemed so "ordinary". Nothing really to stand out... nothing really very noticeable about me or the way I was. I have friends that are SOOO talented and beautiful, that I was never jealous... just satisfied to be noticed second, or by the way. (This is not a pity party)

When I first met my hubby, he began to make me believe in things about myself that I never wanted to believe. AND really his family did too. It's not that my family didn't make me believe in myself, I just saw it in a different light. There are many times, when I wear makeup to feel pretty, that he doesn't even notice that I'm wearing it, "b/c I'm beautiful no matter if I wear it or not." He has NEVER said that he thought I was too "Curvy" (yes, I mean fat), b/c I've never really been "skinny" either, according to the world's view of skinny, which is VERY skinny. I think you know what I mean. We have it shoved in our faces every day with magazines and tv, it's ridiculous. How can we have a healthy body image when the world tells you YOU are too fat??? He always tells me he hates that "skinny" that I never was anyway.

Now, getting onto my main point. When I was pregnant with our first baby girl, I gained A LOT of weight. And lets be honest. It wasn't like I was exercising and FIT with I got pregnant with her either. I wasn't exercising at all. I gained A LOT of water weight RIGHT from the beginning. I couldn't wear my wedding right when I was just 12 weeks pregnant! I didn't even realize how bad it was until after I had her and I looked back at pictures. (Yes, I lost it all and then some with some HARD CORE P90X! That is no joke. HARD WORK!) Wow. It REALLY did look like I was carrying twins. I can't even believe the people that would give me sympathetic looks, and ALWAYS ask me when I was due. I STOPPED saying "April" b/c it was winter and that seemed A LONG way away, and then they would be in shock b/c it looked like I was ready to have the baby NOW! One time in January, I had about 12 weeks left, and a lady said to me, "You're about ready any day now, right?" And I was SO ANGRY!!!! NO!!! I have 12 more weeks!!!!!! OMG HOW RUDE!!!! (And really don't ever say anything like this to a pregnant woman..... ever.)

SO, I had Eliza, 43.5 pounds later. Now, I'm sure you feel sorry for me.. and my friends and family are, I'm sure laughing right now, but it was so ridiculous. THIS TIME, I'm over 10 pounds LIGHTER. I don't really have ANY of that water retention that I had with E, and I FEEL GREAT! There are times when I don't even FEEL pregnant (besides the aches in my pelvis/ hips and achy feet after a days work).  Seriously, I forget sometimes. I know a lot of that has to do with  being busy with a toddler. BUT I feel so good. I'm so thankful for this. I'm kind of nervous about the birth, b/c Eliza was difficult with her "shoulder dystocia".. but that is a different story! :)

SO for those of you rejoicing with me right now, and wanting proof.. here it is. 31 weeks.








The belly seems the same to me, but WOW the face DOES NOT! Like I said, I feel so much better this time. AND NO NEW STRETCH marks yet either! I'm expecting some toward the end, but you should see how many I got on my HIPS AND THIGHS with Eliza, Yes, my butt looks smaller too, let's just say it. WAY less weight gained makes me VERY happy!!!!!!!!


YAY FOR PREGNANCY!!!!! I can't wait! Only 8.5 more weeks!!!!!





Sunday, February 5, 2012

Super Bowl!

So here I sit with my hubby watch the PRE-GAME show. It's funny how little things like this can make us feel so peaceful. We have a little menu planned of game foods, and we aren't even going anywhere! I love it when my hubby gets excited about something. A sort of passion comes out in these things, and it always makes me smile. We are excited to hear Kelly Clarkson sing (ok that may just be me) and Madonna's half time performance (mostly to see how horrible it is). He has been telling Eliza all day what we're gonna eat after nap time, and that we are gonna watch football! She seemed excited as well.


Loving my life right about now! :) Happy Super Bowl!!!




Thursday, February 2, 2012

Learning

Today I listened to a Focus on the Family broadcast called God's Design for Parenting.. and I cried. It's like I was listening to my own mind, but someone else was speaking it! The jest was God is judging us on how we react to our children's actions, even though the world judges us on how our children act. Our responsibility as parents is to raise Godly children, and we don't have forever. Look at your babies. Weren't they just newborn? Wow. I was STRUCK. We have only been given so much time to be a Godly influence to our children.. and are we? Is what I say telling her this is how Christ would talk? Is how I act telling her this is how Christ would act? I've already become a witness to how little time she needs to pick something up. She is smart. Is this the kind of WIFE I want her to become? Or even mother?? What example am I setting, really?? It seems like this is something we've all heard before, but today it really hit home. God has really been dealing with me and working with me on the wife He has called me to be. The Godly wife. The supportive wife. Yes, the submissive wife. I think we all know that I have an opinion. :) God, in His gentle way, is teaching me to be like Christ as a wife.

I cannot believe how having a child is changing me, challenging me and teaching me. I'm SO grateful for these "gifts" that God has entrusted me with. I can't believe what I'm learning along the way. I feel like my eyes are opening for the first time. God is so gracious. I can't wait to see what He will teach me next!!!!!!


And baby makes 4!!! :)

Monday, January 30, 2012

30 weeks and counting!

Can you believe that I'm already 30 weeks pregnant!? Where has the time gone?! Last night I was having a "moment". Eliza will be 2 right at the same time that I have this baby.. and I'm not sure I'm ready for that. Casey will be planning her birthday party... or getting it ready rather... and I will have a newborn. I'm confident that this one will be "easier" than Eliza was, just b/c I've done it once before, and I will have Eliza to keep me laughing through post-partum (Spl?). Casey will be AMAZING, as always, keeping me grounded and not letting my imagination run off with me. He is so good for me. Where would I be???

ANYWAY, as I was laying in bed crying last night, God gave me this truth, and my heart was settled. "I am in control." You see, I am at slightly a higher risk with this birth, since Eliza had "shoulder dystocia", which I learned from our OB that we are now seeing, has no real definition. What it may be to someone will be something else to another. Anyway, We've decided to see the OB incase something may go wrong with this birth.. and naturally, this makes me anxious. I KNOW that my God is in control, but I was praying,, HOW do I make myself REALLY believe this?! Then BAM! I said.. I know You are in control. You are in control.. and I just kept saying it... You are in control. You are in control. And this PEACE came over me. A peace that only God can bring. And I was able to fall asleep. God IS in control of this birth.. and He already knows what's going to happen. I can rest in this.

So here is my progress so far...


4 weeks to 30 weeks. :) We still have to get this new baby girl's room ALL ready.. including paint.. and a new mattress either for Eliza, or new baby. I can't believe how different it is being pregnant this time. Everything is going by so much faster, and I feel calmer (besides having panic attacks about Eliza growing up so fast). God has been so good to our family. I am so blessed!!!!!!!!!



Happy Monday from this Charlie-Brown-loving 21 month old!!!

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Yay! It's Tuesday!

Let me be honest. I hate Tuesdays. I almost hate Mondays because the next day is Tuesday. It's depressing. I work at 4 am. That's right.. Feel sorry for me...

Lol, I'm totally kidding. Don't feel sorry for me. I'm blessed to have a job and on the upside.. I always get off at 1 on Tuesday! I almost always have Wednesday's off.. so its like 1 1/2 days off in a row, every week! :)

So tonight it's mommy and daddy movie/ pizza night! I can't wait!!!!

Happy Tuesday night everyone!!!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Green Living

I am not that creative. Sometimes I find myself in the middle of ENVY when I see or hear of something someone else is doing or creating. I've never thought of myself as a "writer/ blogger".  My husband is way more capable of thinking "outside the box" than I am. I really could go ON AND ON about this subject, but instead I will tell you one thing that I AM good at...

Cleaning. 

It is probably my no-thing-left-unnoticed personality that helps me out here. It's taken me a while to embrace this character trait of mine, because some can find it annoying and irritating. God bless my hubby who has lived with me for 5+ years now, and just "gone with it". He is amazing. :) But really, I find it a blessing to have this passion. Becoming a mother has really helped me LET GO of some things in life, because really, everything can be cleaned up!! Who cares what is looks like IN THE MOMENT. We have to enjoy things as they come our way. Although, I think Eliza is learning something, because she is always "cleaning" something. :) Maybe its just because she sees me doing it, or she really IS like me! 

Anyway, lately I've been getting asked my recipe for my homemade laundry soap... so here it is!! 

1 4lb box Baking Soda
1 3-4lb box Washing Soda (the size is a little over 3lbs now I think)
3 bars GRATED Castile Soap (I use Kirks Castile Soap b/c we sell it at Hy-Vee)
1-2 small containers of OXI CLEAN (or off brand), depending on how dirty your clothes are usually

MIX all these ingredients in a trash bag and ROLL it ROLL it ROLL it until you are SURE that it is all mixed. Use 1 TBS for smallish-normal loads and 2 TBS for large loads. I use the scoop from my Oxi Clean container, b/c it's 2 TBS. I normally add some more Oxi Clean to my Whites and Towels for an extra boost. And YES it's HE compatible. 

Also, during the summer time, I just use vinegar as my softener, and usually take out my hubby's basketball shorts, and fleece, since they aren't 100% cotton, they produce static. In the winter I usually use Seventh Generation laundry softener to help with the static situation, and may still take out the things that aren't 100% cotton. 

I've been using this soap for a couple months now, and it works just fine!! This is just one of the things that I do in my home to be GREEN. I use little to ZERO chemicals all throughout my home, and yes, I take pride in that. :) Hope you find this helpful!

Happy Sunday! 

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Today.

Today I'm tired. Today I worked until 4, and Wednesday is usually my day off. Today I went to the dentist (which I actually like). Today my house is messy. Today my legs ache. Today my eyes and the area all around my eyes are sooo tired, and dark.

Today..... is one day. I'm so thankful that when I'm feeling overwhelmed by things that I didn't get done this week I can just spend some time with God, and then my family, and feel so much better. My God is bigger. My God is stronger than me. Especially in this third trimester (that is starting to catch up to me).

Tomorrow is another day. Saturday we are going to Des Moines with Casey's dad's side to an indoor waterpark overnight. I'm excited about this. Hoping to relax. Hoping to rest. Hoping. Sometimes that can be more stressful than restful.

Today I would normally have accomplished a lot more things. Oh well. Life goes on. :)

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sunday!!

It's Sunday!!!! Yay!!

 What sort of things do you do on Sunday? In our home, we go to our FABULOUS church, then out to eat, then Eliza and mommy nap (daddy may not "nap", but he MAY fall asleep on the couch:)), then we just hang out for the rest of the day!

I love Sundays! No housework, nope. Not on Sunday!!! :)

Happy Sunday!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, January 13, 2012

Cleanliness is next to... craziness??

You know that feeling.

 That relief, that sigh of satisfaction, that weight lifted off your shoulders, that sense of accomplishment..........

You know... when...

Your house is CLEAN!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my goodness, I cannot even describe this feeling I get when my house is spic and span. I, of course, can't put it in the same category as love for my daughter or hubby, but OH THE FEELING of a clean house!

I recently had a little "getaway" with some of my fabulous gal pals, and this subject came up more than once. I LOVED our stories that we shared. Its very fun when you all have different ways of doing things, and reasons on why you do them.

So I've been thinking lately, with some encouragement, maybe I'll blog about that for a while. Not quite sure where to start.. maybe my day to day life being ME. A lot of what I do just seems "normal", but I'm finding out that I may be a little more "detailed" (to put it lightly) than some people. :)

What do you think?? Having a clean home sure is important to me!! :)